Con't . . . A New Day

Ok, well, it worked! For those of you keeping up with my blog, you'll now be able to catch up and read about my precious Uncle Cliff's passing and the beginning of the Lenten Season (A Big Cleaning), which was actually posted about February 25th or so. (Not January as it states)


















It's time to talk about Dad for a bit (a.k.a., my husband, Fr. Philip, Fr. Dad, Papa, Chaps, etc.), and his eminent deployment to Afghanistan. He will leave toward the end of April and return sometime around the beginning of next March! (ugg!) We are in the middle of designing lots of ways to keep in touch with him, but because of where he's going in Afghanistan there's nothing there but sand right now! The Marines are building a base there from scratch, so there won't even be a lot of communication in the beginning. Everyone will be sleeping and working in tents and eating MRE's. It's going to be a bit old-fashioned - we'll have to actually (oh my goodness!!) send MAIL!! And who knows how long it could take to make it from here to there. No one knows at this point. For those of us writing a lot of letters, it'll be like the early days and we'll need to number our letters again so as not to get them all mixed up. Sometimes a whole bunch could arrive at once after not getting any mail for weeks, etc.

Chaps (as I will call Dad for the duration) is the Command Chaplain for the entire operation that you're hearing about all over the news lately and is ultimately responsible for over 8,000 Marines and 15 Chaplains from many different denominations. He's the only Eastern Orthodox Chaplain, however. Interestingly, he once asked the Commanding General what level of involvement he was expecting of him, especially with regard to the civil affairs piece of this operation? And he looked right at him and said, "I expect you to be very involved!" Pretty amazing choice of words in our world!

What does this mean, exactly? Chaps will find out a little bit more today as he goes to a class on government and economics of Afghanistan! Whew!


So, it is really happening! He's really going! As many of us wives so often say in the military, "Here we go again!"

A New Day

This is a test to see if my post will work an actually post with today's date???

A Big Cleaning

(I wanted to write about cleaning at the beginning of the Lenten Season, but I was having trouble posting to my blog at that time. I'm trying again to post today and will then add a new post if this works)





Americans make New Year’s resolutions. Japanese do o-souji, cleaning that is!

Literally, it means free and clean. It refers to the year-end cleaning Japanese do. Not just a little neatening up. Hands-and-knees, sweat-equity scrubbing, sweeping, waxing and buffing so they enter the new year ready for whatever awaits them. It's big business too! In the month of December, even Hello Kitty gets in the picture! More broadly, it refers to the custom of getting your affairs squared away before Dec. 31. That means paying all overdue bills, performing any obligations yet unmet and metaphorically purifying yourself. We move, if we follow the Oriental calendar, from one Year to the next.

"Hungry for Words" writes: In the west, at the start of spring is the time to do a big cleaning. In Japan, (o-souji), which literally does mean ‘big cleaning’, is at the end of the year. O-souji is not just about getting the house in order before relatives and friends come over on New Year’s Day. It has a spiritual and religious significance.

I was talking with a friend yesterday, explaining a little bit of this to her, and how after living in Japan for so many years I began to look at spring cleaning more as my o-souji! Meaning that I have found more spiritual and religious significance to it than just the spring cleaning I was brought up with stateside. I've blended it a bit more with my Christian life and here is the outcome:

Liturgically, in the Eastern Orthodox Church, Clean Monday marks the beginning of Lent—and thus Lent itself—begins on the preceding (Sunday) night, at a very moving and special service called Forgiveness Vespers, which culminates with the Ceremony of Mutual Forgiveness, where all present will bow down before one another and ask forgiveness. In this way, the faithful begin Lent with a clean conscience, with forgiveness, and with renewed Christian love. This first day of Great Lent is called “Clean Monday” because Christians are called upon to begin the holy season with “clean hearts and good intentions.” It is also because the season of Lent is regarded as a time when Christians should clean up their spiritual house; coming to terms with their lives and rededicating themselves to a more holy and righteous way of living. The entire first week of Great Lent is often referred to as "Clean Week," and it is customary to go to Confession during this week, and to clean their own home thoroughly. The theme of Clean Monday is set by the Old Testament reading appointed to be read at the Sixth Hour on this day (Isaiah 1:1-20), which says in part:"Wash yourselves and ye shall be clean; put away the wicked ways from your souls before Mine eyes; cease to do evil; learn to do well. Seek judgment, relieve the oppressed, consider the fatherless, and plead for the widow. Come then, and let us reason together, saith the Lord: Though your sins be as scarlet, I will make them white as snow; and though they be red like crimson, I will make them white as wool (v. 16-18).

Clean Monday is a public holiday in some countries such as Greece and Cyprus, where it is celebrated with outdoor excursions, the consumption of shellfish and other fasting food, and the widespread custom of flying kites. Eating meat, eggs and dairy products is traditionally forbidden to Orthodox Christians throughout Lent, with fish being eaten only on major feast days, but shellfish is permitted. This has created the tradition of eating elaborate dishes based on seafood (shellfish, mollusks, fish roe etc). The happy, springtime atmosphere of Clean Monday may seem at odds with the Lenten spirit of repentance and self-control, but this seeming contradiction is a marked aspect of the Orthodox approach to fasting, in accordance with the Gospel lesson (Matthew 6:14-21) read on the morning before, which admonishes:"When ye fast, be not, as the hypocrites, of a sad countenance: for they disfigure their faces, that they may appear unto men to fast. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. But thou, when thou fastest, anoint thine head, and wash thy face, that thou appear not unto men to fast, but unto thy Father which is in secret... (v. 16-18)."In this manner, the Orthodox celebrate the fact that "The springtime of the Fast has dawned, the flower of repentance has begun to open..."

Ideally, what I like to do is begin cleaning just as soon as Meat Fare Week begins and have a final "big cleaning" during the first week of Lent. This helps to set the tone for Lent and keep me free of the distraction for needing to do a lot of housework during the Lenten Season. Once the Paschal (Easter) Season begins, my home is fresh and clean, ready for the new year and all that awaits me. (This is the goal) One day (or year, as it were) I will fully succeed in my quest!

Will you join me this year in "A Big Cleaning?"

Cliff Tyner - Of Blessed Memory

Blessed Memory:


Yesterday morning, our precious Uncle Cliff ended his six-year long battle with colon/liver cancer, and went home to be with the Lord! His family was by his side.

My earliest memories of him are when I was 14 years old and I was in his and Auntie Karen's wedding in Flaggstaff, Arizona. Not long after that, I stayed with Auntie Karen when Uncle Cliff was away with the Navy when I was 15 years old; their twin girls, Christy and Cathy, were born when I was engaged to Phil, and they were a year old when we were married and moved to Japan . . . and the list goes on and on . . . ! Many of our families memories are shared memories, and Uncle Cliff was always there - the stable rock!

He was a brilliant engineer, inventor, faithful friend, and gentle leader of his family.



















These pictures were taken two years ago when he and Auntie Karen were visiting us in Japan. He was very sick then too and wasn't even sure he was going to make the one-month trip. But he had a wonderful time - as did we all! Mom and Dad were with us for a two-month stay too, at the same time. I love the sweet expressions on his face. It was a trip of a lifetime and chalked full of preciously sustaining memories!




May his memory be eternal!

A Benicia Pelican

The phone rings on the boat and to my surprise it's Papa! (I thought he had left 5 minutes earlier for the store to purchase some lunch) "Hey, look out the window," he says! "There's a pelican on the dock just a few feet away from the boat. He dove and caught a fish for his breakfast and he's just finishing the last gobbles." So I take a look as we're talking and there he is, in all his majesty - bigger than I always imagine! We both watch him for another minute or so - me from the boat, Papa from the rental car - and then "our pelican" takes off to circle the marina for more fish.

That got us to thinking, "How big are pelicans anyway?" So, I looked it up. Brown pelicans are 4 to 5 feet in length and have a wing span of 6 to 8 feet! Wow! No wonder he looks so big! And what's even more amazing is that they weigh anywhere between 6 to 12 pounds! Now that is a big bird!

Pelicans are majestic and powerful, but they seem to have a bit of a sense of humor too!

This pelican stetches his beak and the one below shares his food! What a crack-up!

My . . . How The Months Go By?

How does the time go by so quickly? Christmas is just around the corner!! It seems like just a few months ago I was writing to you and commenting about the how quickly the summer had passed and that Mom & Dad and the "Jesse Pelikan Family" had moved to North Carolina, and Johnny coming back from Afghanistan, but that was all the way back in February and April! An entire summer and fall have come and gone since then; Karis had her 4th birthday in July, Jesse and Elina celebrated their 4th anniversary, John and Rondi celebrated their 6th anniversary, and we had our 36th wedding anniversary on the 2nd of September! Misha turned 3 in October and Elijah began his 2nd year of life on the 1st of November! Now that is really amazing! Elijah is one-year old already! Wow! We had our first annual Thanksgiving gathering at Mom & Dad's new North Carolina home (Gami & Grandpa's) - a great potluck feast with all the family, and as of the 15th of November, the Advent Season is upon us.







Phil (a.k.a. Papa, Fr. Philip, Fr. Dad, Chaps, Chappie) is deploying to Iraq with the Marines this coming mid-January, and will be gone at least one year! It's a blessing that I didn't have two gone to the middle-east at the same time! Johnny is officially out of the Army now. He is what is called on "terminal leave", which means he will use up the rest of the leave he has on the books (be on vacation) before he gets out of the Army in early January. Then he starts his new job with a company called Booz Allen Hamilton (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Booz_Allen_Hamilton) What's even better is that he will be staying in the Fayetteville area and won't have to move away anywhere! Hurray and thanks be to God for that!


Jesse is enrolled in college for the second time and doing extremely well! He is pursuing a Bachelor of Science Degree from the Art Institute of Pittsburgh in Computer Gaming and Design, after which he hopes to work for a gaming development company, like Epic Games (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Epic_Games) here in NC (just 45 minutes from our homes), or possible companies such as Rockwell or Lockheed/Martin developing simulation programs for training in real-time to train troops in virtual reality, doctors for surgery, etc. It's a great career field with endless potential!



While "Papa" is "at work" in Iraq for a year, I'll keep things in order on the home front. It's wonderful to have my entire family close by to keep me company and help (when needed). This is a first for me, however, and I know it's going to help the time go by so much faster.




We'll keep the boat nice for Papa and look forward to lots of fun times of fishing and boating with family and friends when he gets back home!

Where Have You Been Lately?!!

Hi Everyone,

Wow! It's hard to imagine that the entire summer has come and gone and I've not posted on my blog even once! My friends in Japan especially must wonder what has happened to me? Gomenasai! (Forgive me!)

After John's big homecoming, I was very sick this summer with salmonella poisoning; my mom broke her shoulder; my dad had surgery on his hand, and I was helping out Jesse and Elina by watching the kids off and on while they got started back to work and got their schedules sorted out. Needless to say it was pretty crazy couple of months!

On Papa's weekends he's worked very hard (with help from the boys and the reward and dip in the pool afterward - ahhhh!) on the backyard putting an above-ground pool and more deck in for the family, and we've all enjoyed it very much this summer. It's been busy but wonderful, however, and I'm feeling my energy returning little by little.

So, I'm ready to start blogging again and to get ready for phase two of life here in "Pelikan Parish" . . . as I mentally dubbed our little community here in North Carolina here the other day while listening to the news about Louisiana and Texas. Pelikan Parish has a life of its own, believe me, and I find myself just kind of along for the ride at the moment - which is a lot different than I thought it would be, that's for certain. But that's ok and it's all good.

The grand kids are growing like weeds! Elijah was 10 months old on the 1st of September and is a very big boy! He's a whopping 27 pounds! You should see his feet and hands - reminiscent of Great Dane puppies! (ha) Very cute! He's adorable with the temperament to match and we all just adore him.

Misha will be 3 years old on October 17th! How time flies!

She is constant energy and conversation, and seems to be learning continuously. She uses her daddy's ipod with the ease of a 5-year old! Plays games - all sorts! She's is a master at puzzles and is getting braver in the pool with each plunge. So fun!

Karis has turned my favorite age - FOUR! Her birthday was this past July 15th and we all celebrated at our house. I've always loved four-year-olds. She's the little matriarch of the group and wants to mother her cousins and help them - so cute! She pushes Misha on the swing now and helps us feed Elijah. She'll be swimming all by herself in no time too.

More pictures and catching up tomorrow . . . for now I must pull myself away from the computer and do some "actual" work on my house.

Until then . . .

(((hugs))) and blessings

John's Car

This is the video that our son Jesse put together so that all of you could share in the joy of all that went into that day, even though you weren't able to be with us in person.
Enjoy!

Coming Up For Air!

Hello Everyone,

Well . . . John is finally home! And the car surprise was such a success too! I do feel like I took a deep breath about two weeks ago, however, (as is evident by my lack of blog entries) and then jumped into the deep end only to come up for air for the first time just yesterday! But in a really good way - Wow! We had such a wonderful time welcoming Johnny home with family and dear friends here. The only thing that would have made it more perfect is if you all could have been here with us!

I have so much to share with you that it's going to take days and days - maybe weeks. Here are a few pictures and links to get you started:

We all met John's plane at the base, and of course Elina captured it in her beautiful way. Click here to see a slide show of the homecoming: http://www.pelikanportraits.com/

Then the big "Car Surprise"! What a success! Thanks to all of you we did meet our goal and finished the car for John! He was flabbergasted, to say the least!

Waiting . . .

When he came to what he thought was just a family breakfast at his grandma and grandpa's, and walked out the back door to see what everyone was doing, he said things like, "No way!" and "Holy cow!" and "What the heck?" . . . it was great!!!

Then the classic "man" viewings and explanations by the guys who did all the work ensued. It was a wonderful day! There are hundreds of pictures and lots of video. I'll be careful not to overdo it, I promise. But for now, I at least wanted to give you a little something so that you will know that all is well on the Pelikan home front!

(((hugs))) and blessings,

~Tamera~

Click on January in the BLOG ARCHIVE to see the Ordination Slide-Show

Seven Times To Say I'm Sorry

"I'm Sorry” . . .

• When I'm wrong
• When I'm careless
• When I'm rude
• When I'm defensive
• When I'm impatient
• When I'm negative
• When I'm hurtful

The five worst places to resolve conflict:

• In front of the TV
• In front of the kids
• In public
• In transit
• From different rooms

Brain Funk

Sometimes I feel stuck in my mind, if there can be such a thing. I've noticed throughout my lifetime that I go into what I call a brain funk. It's like when you eat too much ice cream and freeze your brain for a few seconds, only this lasts a little longer. . . like a pause while thoughts have the chance to travel on little journeys to be processed and become all they were meant to be as they think about super busy projects or a very stressful situations coming up, etc.


If I'm not careful I could be "traveling" for days . . . in a strange kind of daze, pausing here and there in my mind wondering what I ought to be doing and how I ought to be doing it, instead of coming into the rest stop.

One of the things I HAVE learned, however, is to try and do at least one of the things on my mind as soon as I can - that's all - and go to bed! (If you know me, you know that this processing usually happens at night!) Sadly, I have been a night owl from birth. BUT . . . aren't Proverbs 31 women supposed to get up very early, before everyone else, and bake bread from scratch and all kinds of other stuff like that? I know . . . I've always felt bad about not getting up real early - but not this chick-a-dee! Just can't do it! It even says in my baby book that "she loves to sleep in." So, I blame this "birth defect" entirely on my mother - ha! At least I have a lot of energy in the evening.

Everyone will have a better outlook in the morning when rested and ready to face the day - night owl or not! Therefore, tonight I am writing this one thing . . .


and going to bed!





ZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz

Who We Are, Is Who We Were

As most of you know my husband and I live apart during the week, and then he comes home each weekend. Fr Dad, "Papa," then spends time with the family before he heads back down to Camp Lejeune (130 miles away) to repeat the process all over again for the next week. He is what is called a Geo-bachelor Chaplain at Camp Lejeune.



We spend a lot of time on the telephone (as you can well imagine), of course, and writing emails back and forth, and I wanted to share one email that he sent to me recently. It is especially significant during this Lenten Season and I pray this small glimpse into our lives will bless you in a measure as it did (and does) me:


Honey,

I love you and miss you a lot when I'm down here at the Marine base during the week. Even though we've been married for so long, I still understand that we have so much room to grow in our relationship, and I'm thankful that this growth will never stop. As we work our way through this Great Lent, I pray that whatever things I've said or done in the past that have caused you pain are fading to the point where your feelings and needs for ever increasing security with me are now stronger than ever. Yet I've learned enough to know that the past never really goes away, and that the mistakes we make and the thoughtless things we say and do, no matter how small, still can cause pain. I don't ever want to be like those stupid men who say "can't we just put this behind us?", because they really don't understand how much the past always remains a part of us.

I often remember the line from "Amastad" where John Quincy Adams eloquently lays out that most profound truth about our past:

Remember? (From the movie Amistad http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amistad_%281997_film%29)

"What we've come to understand ... what we've been made to understand ... is that who we are ... is who we were!"

Everything we've thought about, acted upon, dreamed about and slipped into in the past comprises who we are now. That's why it's so important to be constantly repentant, and to focus on the good, the pure, and the things that are of good report, so that the future holds blessings for us and not curses. As we now know, the blessings or the curses that come upon us from God do not come from His capriciousness, but from Him in a singular flow of "energy," the effect of which is determined by our heart's disposition.

As we continue to move through this Lenten time, please forgive me for the stupid little lapses in caring for you, like the hurtful things I've said to you now and then. I feel very bad when it happens! And although I can't take them back I pray that having experienced the pain of what uttering them does to you, I will think more than twice before saying things like them again.

All my love,
+Me


We've come along way in our almost 36 years of marriage! It's easy to bring up things in the past (in an instant, actually!), and it can be painful sometimes. But it's who we are, because "who we are, IS who we were! I don't think I would change a thing now. And, if I were to "undo" anything, then I wouldn't be who I am now, and wouldn't be where I am in my life now.

(Having faith) Fight the good fight - Wage the good warfare! (1 Timothy 1:19)

The Weekly Window

Have you heard about The Weekly Window? Jesse and Elina Pelikan (our older son and daugher-in-law) have recently created this site for you to see and listen to the stories and origins of the pricious Icons of the Holy Orthodox Church. Explore the beauty of Iconography each week by visiting: http://weeklywindow.com/

I have provided a link to this site on the side bar under "Check This Out"

The Many Faces of Elijah - 4 1/2 months old

Some recent shots taken of Elijah. I thought it would be fun to see some of the different looks he has.

What a doll, huh?

And he has the personality to match! He's as sweet as can be, and a little cuddle-bug too!

Surviving the Hard Stuff

Step Three (step one and two are written earlier)

Learn how to catch the wave as it breaks/Face the hard stuff head on!

This is a picture of how I imagine a perfect day at the beach. Leisurely swims, holding hands and just basking in the sun.

But , of course just as in life, this isn't always reality! Often times it will look like this and whoa . . . you find yourself having to go out in the water anyway (for some reason). If this is the case, there is one thing to keep in mind:

Never slow down for an incoming wave; always charge straight into it.

I will never forget the feeling of exhilaration at figuring out how to do this. Suddenly the fear that had haunted me in previous attempts of venturing out into the bigger surf was reduced exponentially! I finally had it! The knowledge and skill I needed to navigate safely to the other side, even though the wave was HUGE! I finally knew that in larger surf I should dive under the waves and not try to swim through it, or (God forbid) try to jump over the treachery. If the surf was too big, I could dive straight through, but when the wave was really big, I must dive to the bottom and grab some sand and then bring my feet to my hands and push up at 45 degrees to the back of the wave above me. Before I knew it, I would be safely BEHIND the big wave!

When we see the hard stuff coming at us in life, whether at home or at work, we must try to face it head on and charge straight into it. Learn the exhilaration of facing the situation by diving into it with God’s plan for conquering the task at hand. Even if it seems overwhelming and far too big to handle, we can dive into it, under it, and then up and through it, just like the wave. The key--practice, practice, practice -- and a whole lot of bravery!

Here are a few things the Bible has to say to us about it:

"I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need.
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Nevertheless, you have done well with me to share in my affliction." (Philippians 4:12-13)

"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm." (Ephesians 6:10-13)